


Demons

by FlynnItUp



Category: Jessica Jones (TV), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-27 12:11:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15685185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlynnItUp/pseuds/FlynnItUp
Summary: When she's left alone, Jessica's demons come back to haunt her.





	Demons

If there was one thing Jessica Jones was good at, it was drowning out the memories. Usually said drowning was done in a bottle of cheap, rotgut whiskey either from the local store or in some shitty dive bar somewhere. As long as it was alcoholic, it helped her forget. At least for a little while. But every so often it all came creeping back, like tendrils trying desperately to dig into her brain. Like poison ivy wanting to eat away at her very soul. The thing was that when those tendrils, when that poison ivy took hold, there was only one voice that bounced around and around in her head. There was only one colour that she associated with such awful memories. There was only one face that came floating back into her subconscious to haunt her.

Zebediah Kilgrave.

He was the reason she drank so hard. He was the reason she had a constant hangover. He was the reason she was so fucking bitter and twisted and….and afraid to let anyone in. Fuck, the very memory of that man had made it so difficult for her to let Oscar in. The very memory had made her push the guy away more than once, afraid that he would be just as manipulative as that purple suited megalomaniac. 

Anyone who looked at her, who came across her, thought she was fearless. They thought that she was someone who didn’t give a shit about anyone or anything. But that couldn’t be further from the truth. The truth was that she cared too much. The truth was that she was afraid to lose those that she did care about – her best friend Trish, her friend and co-worker Malcolm, Geri, Oscar… But if she was so afraid then why did she push them away? She’d cut Trish out after she’d betrayed her. She’d cut Malcolm out at the same time. She tried pushing Geri away at every chance she got. Not to mention the way she’d been with the Defenders. It was some sort of defence mechanism, surely. Push them all away before they can hurt you. She’d been hurt far too many times in the past, she was battered and bruised and her soul ached. It had all started with the death of her parents – only for her mother to rise from the dead, only to die all over again. 

She wasn’t sure how much more hurt she could take. Especially given as how she relived some of her most painful memories in her dreams night after night.

The glass in her hand trembled slightly as she lifted it to her lips, the sound of cheap whiskey sloshing against its edges breaking the silence of her scantly decorated apartment. The movement was automatic now. Lift, swallow, drop, repeat. She was like an automaton, going through the motions in order to survive. There was so little emotion in her, now. When was the last time she’d been truly happy? The truth was, she couldn’t remember. Oh, there had been snatches of it here and there. The dinners that had been filled with laughter in Oscar’s apartment. The jokes shared with Trish before she’d betrayed her. 

She swallowed the last mouthful of whiskey before setting the glass down and dropping her head into her hands. But as she let her eyes close there was the flash of a familiar face, that wolfish smile that turned her stomach. And then that whisper of her name, almost as if he were right there with his lips against the shell of her ear.

“Jessica”

Ice settled in the pit of her stomach then and her eyes shot open, sure that she would see Kilgrave’s face. But there was nothing. The room was empty.

It was just her and her thoughts. Her and her demons.


End file.
